Big Brother – Thursday, August 30th – Eviction

Wow, I don’t think Julie has ever praised a HG as much as she did with Dan tonight.  I have some time to think about it, and I must admit that Dan made a brilliant move.  Not only did he get himself off of the block for the week, when I was convinced he was going home, but he also probably secured Britney’s eviction tonight.  There will be 5 votes tonight, so you just need 3 votes in order to be kicked out. 

Since this is an eviction episode, I must bring up my 3 salient points again.  My “sure” signs you are going home tonight.  The first sign that Britney is probably going to be living la vida loca with Ashley is that she is dressed up.  Danielle looks like she is ready to compete in tonight’s HOH.  The 2^nd point is when BB tries to convince you of something you know is not true.  I will hit on this as we go along through the episode. I know I usually say there is no crying in BB, but I would be upset too if I were going home before Jenn and Joe.  Britney asks Danielle if she knew she was going up in Dan’s place.  She says she is alone in the house, and that Dan is no longer helping her.  I now understand the importance of Dan pitting himself against Danielle.  I will admit I didn’t even consider that, and I will again give Dan a “Ben high-five” of approval of using his confinement wisely. 

Ian's tries to ruin Frank's game

Oh, how the tables have turned against Ian.  Frank started off the week all alone in this house, and if Britney goes home, then Ian will be all by himself.  Britney straight up asks Dan if she is the target this week.  He said that that she would have to talk to the HOH.  Britney basically threatened Dan by saying that it’s important to treat people nicely, especially when they are about to become a juror.  Britney begs Jenn and Frank to keep her this week by offering them both safety next week.  However, Frank still believes that Britney is Ian’s biggest ally.  Ian blows up at Frank, and he tries to disparage Frank’s game.  Well, isn’t this just a case of the nerd calling the carrot orange?  Ian tries to play off his actions last week by saying he only had 3.5 seconds to make all of his decisions during the live show.  I will go ahead and call him out with Frank.  Ian knew what he was doing.  He wasn’t duped by anyone by trying to evict Frank last week.  He is now in a tight corner, and he is trying to explain something that is not justifiable. 

Just think how close Britney was to winning that extra veto this week?  Ian pulls out his biggest threat by saying no one will win against Frank in the final two, so everyone should vote him out next week.  Frank walks away, and in true Ian fashion, he flips him off behind his back. 

Well, what would a live episode without the winner of Britney’s season sounding off on the Twitter machines?  Poor, dumb Hayden tweets and uses the #Bragade.  Just because you were in the alliance, apparently doesn’t mean you know how to spell it.  I thought it was funny and fitting for him!

Well, Britney tries a new tactic.  Instead of trying to gather up some votes for the week, she goes on a tirade against Dan.  She says that he is a master manipulator, and the downside to Dan’s master plan is that now he is the biggest target in the house.  Remember when Dan was a few votes away from being evicted when his last member on his team was on the block?  This game changes all the time, and it goes to show that you are never down and out….unless you are Britney.  Shane makes this about himself, and he is upset about having to voting out his friend or his coach.  If I were him, I would vote to save Britney as she has a better chance at keeping him safe.  Dan will want Danielle to cut off all ties with him in the near future. 

Julie goes in for the live chat session with the HGs, and like I said in previous posts, they usually give generic PC answers, so I usually don’t comment on them.  However, the Chenbot asks Jenn, “How hard was it to use your veto to save Dan?”  She replied, “It was the hardest decision I had to make all game.”  You want to know why it was the hardest decision?  It’s because you haven’t had to make any, as this was the first competition you have won!  By the way, I think that the first person eliminated in tonight’s HOH should be rewarded!  It would make the other HGs so angry.  #BBReward.

Love them or hate them!  BRIGADE!

Then comes the best part of the episode.  They bring back the Brigade for an interview!  I forgot that Enzo called himself the Meow Meow.  Since he came up with the alliance, I still think he is still harboring resentment that they booted him out.  Of course Lane is team Britney this season.  He almost ruined her engagement by flirting with her all season.  Maybe that’s why she thought she would have gone further in her season.  Of course they start ripping on the Quack Pack.  Lane goes as far as saying he would like to be able to carry Ian around in his fanny pack.  The only reason would be to have Ian calculate a 15% of all of his checks at restaurants.  First, who just tips 15%?  Second, this is a huge failure on our education system if he can’t even calculate 15% of $30.  Third, this is why people voted for Hayden to win over him.  They make fun of pretty boy Shane, and it’s hilarious!  Enzo said that Dan is like a werewolf in sheep’s clothing, and that he needs to shave his arms.  How can you give another man manscaping advice after ridiculing Shane for being high maintenance? 

Well, BB didn’t spend a whole lot of time showing Britney fighting to stay in the house, but I still have to give her the 2^nd eviction point of the night as well.  Danielle gave Britney a goodbye message in person, so I am assuming she is safe.  Britney gives the classic “do what’s best for your game speech”, and if she wasn’t going home before, she certainly gets my 3^rd and final eviction point of the night and a nice meeting with Julie.  Here’s how the votes went down:

Dan – Britney – I thought for a brief second that the fourth part of his funeral plan would come into fruition, and he would vote to save her.  Wouldn’t that have been epic?

       Jenn – Britney

       Ian – Danielle

       Shane – Britney – what an idiot

       Joe – Britney – He needs to go next

            Well, after evicting out the evil Boogie last week, Britney has sadly been evicted tonight.  She is obviously a fan favorite, and I am afraid if all the good players keep getting evicted, this season will end in a fizzle.  At this point, I would love to see Frank, Dan, Ian and Danielle in the final four.  It would make for the most interesting end to this season.  I have asked this question after Wil’s and Ashley’s eviction.  I will ask it again of Britney.  Should she be mad that she evicted Janelle a few week’s back?  Oh, I do love this game, and I love that Ian vowed vengeance on Frank.  We all know that he can’t do it, but it will be fun to see him try!  Julie then says that the finale is less than three weeks away!  I can’t believe this season is almost over, and hopefully it means another night of double evictions! 

            The HOH competition begins and I am frustrated that we have to wait until Sunday to see who wins.  Well, Danielle and Shane have both excelled in these competitions this season, so I am thinking that one of them will win.  Ian looks resolute and he has to fight for his safety this week.  I might have to break my no BB After Dark rule and see who wins later tonight.  Janelle is still using her Twitter platform to root for Joe.  Well, he may be the most “loyal” in the house, but I have a feeling that either he or Jenn will be getting the BB punishment tonight.  Well, that was a shocker.  We come back from commercial break, and Joe had already fallen.  I was just about to type that I am pretty sure no one has ever been eliminated before the show ends, while I was fast-forwarding through commercials, so  I guess Joe is definitely the first!  I wonder what his punishment will be?  Next week is another double eviction episode!  That will make for another great week of programming!  And just like that Jenn falls after hitting the meteor.  Maybe we can see the winner before the end credits!?  Oh, guess not. 

            Were you surprised to that Britney was evicted?  Who do you want to win HOH?  Who should win the game?  Sound off in the comment section below! 

Big Brother – Wednesday, August 29th - POV

I am so excited about tonight’s episode.  My BB After Dark friends have all been hinting that it will be another great episode. 

Well, surprise!  The episode begins by showing Danielle crying in the DR. She always cries when things aren’t going her way, and if she wants to win this game, she needs to get over that!  The Quack Pack is working on a plan to save both Danielle and Dan this week.  They are on a power high after evicting Boogie and Ashley last week, and they have Frank in their sites next week.  If one of them wins the veto this week, they will use it to remove Dan or Danielle, and then they will convince Ian to use his veto to save the other member. In order for this plan to succeed, either Shane or Britney will need to win.  If one of them wins, Frank can’t put up both Shane and Britney as replacements.  There would be enough of them still left to control the vote tomorrow, thus ensuring that the entire Quack Pack is safe this week.  The POV drawing couldn’t have gone better for them, as all of the members are competing in the competition.  Jenn approaches Frank before the competition, and she decides to ask Frank for safety and an alliance.  She needs to cover herself in case someone is taken off the block this week.  It’s a smart move on his part, only if he doesn’t have to put up two people, but I am assuming if he does he would choose Joe over Jenn.

The POV competition looks like so much fun!  People have been using the app Draw Something, which I suck at, to draw pictures for the HGs.  The first person to ring in and correctly identify the picture gets a pre-determined amount of points.  The person with the most points after ten rounds wins.  Of course, in true BB style, each correct answer and picture corresponds with a punishment.  Ian, as the dorky host, also informs the HGs that there is no collusion allowed.  If you help someone with an answer, you will be eliminated.  You will also be eliminated if you guess a picture and forgo the   Britney wants Dan and Danielle to throw the competition, so she or Shane can win. This would ensure their safety in the house along with their fellow Quack Packers.  Dan’s not buying it though, and he says he will actually try to win it himself.  I agree that in order to secure your own safety, you have to win that POV!  Each round I listed the picture, the points, the punishment, and the results.  Here is a breakdown of the rounds:

1.     Avocado – 2 points – Dying yourself green. – Frank wins and has to take a green ooze bath.

2.     Hunger – 5 points – Samples two of the four nasty food items – Dan wins this round

3.     Clock – 4 points - Burn your clothes in 90 seconds. – Jenn wins this round.

4.     Shackle – 6 points – Shackle yourself to a HG for 24 hours – Britney wins and chooses Danielle

5.     Shower – 7 points – Chum shower every time an alarm sounds for the next 24 hours. – Frank wins and accepts the punishment.

6.     Carrot – 2 points – Carrot-tard! – Well, Frank is no stranger to sweaty uniforms, so he gladly accepts the points and punishment.

7.     Bench – 10 points – You must sit out of the next eligible HOH competition.  Frank again accepts, and who needs HOH when you are Veto King!  I hope this doesn’t come and screw him over in the end.  Always focus on the end game!

8.     Spots – 6 points - the other HGs canvass you with paint for two minutes.  Danielle wins this easier challenge.

At least Frank now has more clothes!

9.     Trip – 8 points – Take a 24-hour trip to a solitary confinement dance party – Dan gets this one right and accepts the punishment.

10. Summer – 11 points – Britney rings in, but Frank helps her by giving her the answer.  Frank is sadly eliminated…

11. Ticket – 11 points – Take a slop ticket and eat slop for the rest of the summer.  Jenn takes the punishment and wins her first competition!  She is serious about helping Frank!

I have a little more respect for Jenn for what she did.  Frank needed this win for his own game, and now Dan has to rely 100% on Ian to use his veto to save himself.  Dan gets to experience 24 hours of confinement, and he decides to use this time to reflect on a new strategy.  I would personally use the time to sleep, but to each their own!  Britney also has to perform her punishment by being shackled to Danielle.  Frank also has to endure one his punishments by taking chum baths at each alarm.  He seems to take his punishment better than Dan fared his 24-hour confinement.  Afterward Dan decides to have a house meeting to air his realizations that he is going home. He calls it his funeral. I do not buy this crap.  It’s all an act.  He acted as American’s Player during his season, and he put on a great performance then, and he starts to give one now!  He goes around saying nice things to Jenn, Britney, Shane and Joe.  He then saves Ian, Frank and Danielle’s speeches for last.  I just want to let you know that my DVR is currently paused.  He is making a big spiel towards Ian, so that he will use the POV on him, he will probably butter up Frank to make him more of an ally than enemy, and then he has to save Danielle for last because he is her coach, and that’s his life.  Let’s see if I am right….He compliments Ian, and thanks him for making his house experience fun.  He saves Frank’s for later saying that he needs to talk to him one-on-one.  The one “surprising” thing comes when he tells Danielle that she’s basically a piece of crap, and she knows what she did.  I TOLD YOU!!! IT IS ALL AN ACT!  He says that he is done talking game, and leaves it at that.

Evil Genius?

The other HGs realize that he is trying to stay, and they console the now sobbing Danielle.  Dan goes up to the HOH room to talk to Frank.  Dan finally takes this opportunity to throw Ian under the bus.  Dan hints about the formation of another alliance, and Frank FINALLY realizes that Ian has screwed him over.  So the question is raised, who should the next person to be put up?  Why not Britney he asks?  Dan proposes an alliance between himself, Frank, Jenn and Danielle.  Dan’s plan hinges on the fact that Jenn should use her POV on him this week.  Not only does Dan want an alliance with Frank, he strikes a final two alliance with Frank as well.  I still don’t understand why Danielle is so upset.  I also don’t know why Dan has to put sympathy on Danielle’s side.  If this plan works, it will be brilliant.  Dan will be taken off the block; Britney will go in his place.  I wonder if Ian could at that point use his POV to saver her??   I will also take this time to admit, that even though I called out Dan for his act, I had the intentions all mixed up!

Ian has to use his veto first, and he doesn’t use it!  Jenn uses her POV to save Dan, and Frank calls out Ian in front of everyone.  He says that his closest alliance member has been evicted, and it’s time for Ian to feel the same.  So the little respect I gained for Jenn quickly evaporated as she bragged about making a big move this week.  You listened to Frank, that’s not really a big move, but whatever helps her sleep at night.  Britney says she doesn’t have any fight left, and I can understand why.  Hopefully, she can convince Shane, Ian and Joe to vote to save her.  She can make new promises to those three to take them far.  That is her only hope, and I hope she does put up a strong fight to stay in the house.  I am floored that Dan has managed to wiggle his way off the block this week.  I for sure thought he would be going home this week if the Quack Pack didn’t win veto.  This game makes me think of all the things that have to go right in order to win.  What if Dan used his HG choice veto chip to choose Joe?  Would Joe have won POV?  What if Britney actually managed to guess the word summer without Frank telling her?  I would be saying that Frank is going home soon since he can’t compete in the next two HOH competitions!  This game and show are awesome, and I would love to be a part of it!

So, everyone is right.  I didn’t see this coming, and I am so glad I wait each week to watch the episodes!  Who is going home?  What did you think of the episode!  What surprised you the most?  LET ME KNOW!

Keeping Up with the Kardashians – Kardashian Therapy 1

So, the Momager, Kris has landed her dream interview with Oprah.  It’s taped as a whole family event, and I am sure this is her ratings dream come true.  This is a two-part episode, so I am assuming we will see more of the “therapy” as the episode progresses, and more next week.  We can’t have a season end without resolution!

Kimye must have climbed the relationship social ladder because they seem extremely comfortable with each other.  So much so, that Kanye wants to give Kim a whole closet makeover.  I don’t know what I find more surprising.  Is it the fact that Kim has fallen head over heels for a man that hated her style, or the fact that Kanye has the guts to come over to her house and make her get rid of 90% of her clothes?  I can’t take Kanye seriously at all.  He wants to be this hard-core rapper, yet he also thinks that people will respect him as a fashion designer?  I won’t say that he can’t do both, but I will say that he probably won’t be able to do both well. Khloe comes over, and admonishes Kim for getting rid of most of her wardrobe.  She says that even though some of her items are “ghetto”, that everyone should have a little in their closet.

Me either!

Rob goes to Las Vegas to judge the Miss Universe pageant.  He complains that his family doesn’t take him seriously, and he is upset his mom can’t be there with him.  This sounds a lot like Khloe and Kourtney in the years past.  He tries to tell Kim, but she just tells him to get over it and grow up.  She doesn’t have time to listen to his sulking because she has a perfume release press junket.  During Rob’s red carpet event, all of the paparazzi just pepper him with questions about his sisters. 

Of course the Kardashians need to have more exposure, and all three sisters and their momager meet to talk about the possibility of releasing a make-up line.  Of course, Kim is now the fashion expert with her new Kanye clothing peeking through every scene.  The earrings, the tops, the bags, etc. it’s product placement times 100! She doesn’t like using the Kardashian name in the make-up line, and it starts to run Khloe the wrong way.  Kourtney also gets offended when Oprah’s people called to have a one-on-one interview with Kim.  She thinks they should do an interview with herself, Khloe and Kim. 

Although Rob seems to be whiny about his business taking off, he basically wants his mom to do everything (a good momager would!); I can understand his plight of being the youngest.  He doesn’t feel like he is getting the attention, and he says he has no income.  To which Kourtney responds, “It’s a good thing you don’t have any bills!”

The whole family, excluding Lamar, are stressing out over the Oprah interview.  Kylie is overwhelmed due to the sheer amount of people in her house.  I personally hope she and Kendall don’t go the typical Kardashian route.  They can go into fashion, modeling or whatever they want, but please don’t become as exposed as your sisters!  Oprah arrives in a manner as fit and regal for royalty.  She begins by taking pictures with the family, and then individual pictures with the couples of the group.  Kim takes a picture alone with Oprah, and poor Rob is stuck with his two younger sisters.  I think my favorite part of the pre interview jitters is Lamar being obsessed with the bladeless Dyson fan on set.  Khloe and Lamar seem to ace their interview with Oprah, and Kourtney is a nervous wreck!  She says you never know which side of Scott you will get that day.  I wish I knew when this interview aired/will be airing because I think Oprah will hit on some of the issues we all wonder about.  I will just have to keep in mind that the Momager’s editing touches might have been heavy handed as well.

Scott didn’t have anything to worry about, and Kourtney probably got the pregnancy sympathy card.  Kris starts crying almost immediately talking about Scott.  I truly agree with Kim as Oprah has such a natural ease and ability to conduct interviews.  One of the last interviews included Kim, Kourtney, Khloe and Rob.  I think Oprah might have hit on sore spot for Rob, as he tends to believe that his older sisters easily overshadow him. 

Kim announces to her sisters that she was offered another exclusive deal outside of the US.  Kourtney and Khloe again deem the fact that Kim wants to break out on her own as offensive.  Between this and Rob’s animosity towards his sisters prompts the family to seek therapy.  I think this show hits on typical family issues, and I think that is why it has such a huge appeal.  I mean, who wouldn’t want a therapy session with their family?  No?  Maybe it’s just me then!  Kim was against this idea, but once she hears her mother’s approval she jumps on board.  Rob and Kim start yelling at each other before the session even starts.  Rob says Kim is selfish, and Kim says it’s not her job to promote Rob’s career. 

Maybe Kim should take fashion advice from Mason!

Although, I am glad I got to see the therapy session, I think it would have been more productive to not have cameras filming every moment.  Kim starts off the session by saying that she doesn’t like or need therapy in her life.  Rob says that he wants to just remain more private, and that’s why he doesn’t have a whole lot of friends.  NO!  They cut off the camera feeds!  Well, I hope they were able to resolve some of their family issues.  Instead, we get to see Scott and Mason enjoy some time alone.  Ah!  The camera feeds are back on!  However, they just film some of the on top of the surface issues.  Rob, Khloe and Kourtney think that their mom favors Kim the most.  I would go out to say her mom earns more money off of Kim, but I don’t think she loves them less.  She might not give them as much attention in a business sense, and I can see how they might view this as unequal love and support.  Rob leaves the session extremely upset and showing some of the vulnerability that he usually masks as anger towards the family.  This intense session will continue next week, and I am sure that a resolution will be achieved by then!

So, this episode was pretty intense.  Who thinks I should become their therapist?  You can answer honestly?  Do you think that Kris loves one kid more than the others?  Let me know!

Big Brother – Sunday, August 26th – HOH/Nominations

After a roller coaster of an episode on Thursday, we rejoin the house that was left in complete chaos.  I know the game has changed since the beginning, but I do have to give credit to Boogie’s ability to pick a great team.  Frank, Ian and Jenn are still the only three-person team left.  With tonight’s episode, we found out that Ian never really wanted to be the one in charge of evicting Frank.  He tried to throw the HOH competition, but if he really wanted to throw the tiebreaker question, he should have guessed higher.  The entire house corners Ian in the game room, and he tries to throw his weight around with Joe.  He listened to Britney in the end, and he put up Frank and Ashley.  Frank was beyond furious, and Ian was upset that he couldn’t hide behind Dan anymore.  Joe is so egotistical.  He claims he can get off the block just like Frank can….hahaha!  Who is he kidding?  I still find it hard to believe that Ashley was the better person to get rid of over Joe.  After Ashley is evicted, Frank blows up at Ian again, and I was SHOCKED to see Britney crying.  She really feels bad for Ian, and thinks that he can’t handle being yelled at by Frank.  I hate to say this, but I think it’s extremely difficult to win this game if you have a conscience.

            Frank talks to Britney, Danielle and Shane before they play HOH.  His lets them know that his target is still Dan.  He still believes that Dan was the one who convinced Shane to put up him and Boogie up last week.  Danielle asks to speak with Frank alone, and she says that she can’t go against Dan.  She says she won’t go after Frank, but she can’t turn on Dan.  This is the point where I would flip on Ian.  Danielle is sitting in a great spot.  She could protect Dan, her strongest ally, if she would just throw Ian under the bus.  All she has to say is that Ian was the one who gave the idea to Shane to put them both on the block.  Britney realizes that Frank is a great competitor in the game, and she cuts a deal with Frank before the HOH competition.  WOW!   

If you can't beat him join him!

            Later that night, the HGs have to compete in another HOH competition.  The object of the game is to use two strings and a board to maneuver a ball up a maze.  The higher you go, the more points you get.  After this round, the players are ranked according to their score.  After they are ranked the players have to compete head-to-head to see who can get their ball to the top hole.  The people with the worst scores, go first, and then so on and so forth.  Not only does the winner get HOH for the week, but they also get to choose the one person to be a Have Not for the week.  Here is the breakdown of the rounds!

Danielle – 8 (3^rd)

Frank – 5 (6^th)

Shane – 17 (1^st)

Jenn – 6 (5^th)

Joe – 10 (2^nd)

Britney – 7 (4^th)

Dan -  1 (Last)

Head-to-Head

Round 1: Frank vs. Dan – Frank

Round 2: Frank vs. Jenn – Frank

Round 3: Frank vs. Britney – Frank

Round 4: Frank vs. Danielle – Frank

Round 5: Frank vs. Joe – Frank

Round 6: Frank vs. Shane – Frank

            You have to give credit when and where it’s due!  Frank wins HOH, and I am now confident that Dan will throw Ian under the bus.  Frank decides to put Dan on slop, and it’s no secret he is out for blood this week.  Britney goes up to see Frank to see if her deal is still good with Frank.  He says his targets this week are Dan and Danielle.  Britney then solidifies a final four deal with Frank, and this may be her downfall.  If he Quack Pack alliance knows she is making side deals with whoever is in power, they will be less likely to trust her. 

Has anyone not opened Pandora's Box?

            Lucky duck Frank gets the opportunity to open Pandora’s Box.  If he opens the box, he will be guaranteed an unspecified amount of money (up to $10,000), but with something good, that means something bad will be released as well.  Frank decides to open the box, and he gets to open three boxes.  He gets to keep the amount in each of the three boxes, but he will have to stay there for an entire hour afterward.  His first pick was $1.05, his next pick was worth $7.11, and his last pick was worth $3333.33.  After he opens the box, the HGs get a change to get $.50  If they get $.50, they can play the claw game to win the veto.  In order to find the money, BB releases plastic balls that may contain what they need!  Dan finds the first quarters, and he didn’t get the veto.  Ian tries to win it next, and he almost gets it!  Britney hears two quarters near Joe’s foot, and she goes to win the veto.  She gets the ball in the claw, but it drops it before the return chute.  Britney then confesses in the DR that Dan is being selfish during this game.  She says he doesn’t get the big picture, but to me the big picture is he is guaranteed to be put up on the block if he doesn’t win.  Dan also gets the claw around the ball, but it drops again before the chute.  Ian saves his money because he believes that the last person to go has the better chance at getting the veto.  However, he blows his own cover by following Dan too closely.  Ian decides to go to the claw machine, and he wins the POV.  He flips off the other HGs afterward.  At this point Danielle and Dan are upset by Ian’s actions.  His true colors are coming out, and it’s impossible to play the nice, sweet nerd and the mastermind villain.  Maybe he was right a few weeks ago when he said he would make a better villain than hero. 

Do you think he's too arrogant?

            Frank is then released from Pandora’s Box, and Ian tells him that he won the POV.  Frank immediately wants to put up Ian and Danielle because Ian would be forced to use the veto on himself, and he can back door Dan.  Frank ends up nominating Dan and Danielle in hopes that Dan will go home.  Now that Ian has won the extra veto, Dan would be unwise by throwing Ian under the bus. 

I loved this episode, and I love this game!  What do you think will happen?  Who will win the second veto?  Sound off in the comments below!

Here Comes Honey Boo Boo – What is a Door Nut?

The family is starting off their Christmas in July fundraising event by setting up some lawn ornaments during the hottest part of the day.  My mind immediately shoots to Uncle Eddie and Snots.  “She’s a real beaut, Clark!” The set up goes off without a hitch, except for some heat strokes and electrocutions.  It’s amazing they survived as long as they have so far.  Why put on shoes when you can just where socks outside, asks Mama?  You might as well just go bare foot at this point.  Oh, but I forget she has forklift foot to hide from the public.  I hope that TLC does a grand unveiling of her foot at the end of the season.  Between Pumpkin complaining about manual labor and Chickadee about to go in labor, I can’t handle this already.  Christmas is Honey Boo Boo’s favorite holiday, and it if were up to her, she would never take down the decorations.  For a family that is currently perpetuating so many stereotypes, I am shocked that they just don’t leave up their decorations year around!  And to set off the entire scene, they have two sets of train tracks that go by their house every 30 minutes or so.  You know, it really does set the perfect “Redneck” Christmas in July motif. 

Well according to Alana, she has been practicing her Rock Star routine, but when they go to the high school for extra practice, she is thoroughly confused.  She has a defeatist attitude, and just lays on the ground in disgust.  You can’t win a Grand Supreme if you don’t put in the work! However, she is convinced she will win with the help of Glitzy.  “Me gusta Glitzy.” “Mi nombre es Alana.”  I can’t understand half the things she says, but she knows Spanish?  Where did she learn this talent?  She should use it for her pageants.  Granted she says it with the thickest southern accent, but she still speaks it.  Mama doesn’t think that Glitzy is going to be a part of the family much longer.  She says it’s because it keeps her up at night, but I think she is losing her resolve from turning Glitzy into bacon.  She says it’s too much work to raise the pig, and she said that’s just not for her family!  Ain’t nobody got time for that!   They then show a montage of Glitzy moments.  It really just involves Glitzy biting Honey Boo Boo, ooo’ing on the kitchen table, and squealing all day long.  Don’t fret though!  If you really want to know where Glitzy is now, simply logon to tlc.com/honebooboo   I kid you not, they have a Glitzy tracker.  I will save you the suspense; he is currently rotting in the bowels of Mama. 

Mama vs Glitzy

To cheer everyone up, the family decides to visit their family friend Crazy Tony.  He loves to ride his four-wheeler, and he even shows off some of his better moves.  Sometimes he even manages to stay on, but most other times, he crashes into the ditch.  You would think he would wear a helmet, but I guess he would have to go by just Sane Tony, and that’s not fun.  They partake in a Southern tradition of mud bogging.  Pumpkin loves intertubing in the mud, and she gets thrown around a couple of times.  I guess this is to make up for Mama not letting her getting in the flesh eating bacteria pond, known as the redneck bathtub, during the Olympics…I mean Redneck Games.  Crazy Tony even uses the four-wheeler to pick up pumpkin by the feet and hang her from the tree.  I have to truly wonder where they come up with these hidden gems.  Throughout the entire day everyone wanted to see Mama getting dragged through the mud, but she has an aversion to messing up her beautimus.  The real reason, according to Sugar Bear, is that once she gets in, she can’t get out!

Mama says she's beautimus!

Sugar Bear has graciously decided to dress up as Santa for tonight’s charity event.  The entire time he is getting ready, Mama is sexually harassing him.  She has a fetish for men in costumes.  I am no expert, but I thought this meant police or firemen costumes and not one for fictional characters.  Maybe she can get her own segment on my strange addiction and pretend to have a furry habit! 

At the Christmas in July event, if you bring a canned good or a small toy, you get to sit on Santa’s lap and ask for gifts.  The top requests for the night were iPhones and four wheelers.  Santa didn’t do such a great job, and some of the kids just donated their cans and passed on the whole sitting on Santa’s lap.  I think they were revolted when they saw Mama sitting on Santa’s lap.  Well, I think they raised a total of 4 toys and 8 cans of food, and Mama made sure that everyone knew they are all about giving back to the community. 

This is just a funny pic of the country gas station...

Later that night all through the house, not a creature was stirring, except for the fetus growing inside of Chickadee.  She starts to have contractions, and she says she wants the baby out now!  Mama knows she still has 6 weeks to go, but Chickadee insists that the baby is hurting her biscuit.  You see kids?  If you give your privates names like biscuit or hot dog, you become pregnant at 17.  Mama alerts the paramedics that it feels like she has to poop and pee at the same time.  In all seriousness, I hope she is fine, and Mama rides with her in the ambulance to the hospital.  Talk about a cliffhanger ending!

Big Brother – Thursday, August 23rd – Eviction, HOH, POV & Eviction!

A week’s worth of Big Brother in one night!? I can hardly stand the excitement.  Just knowing that Frank is safe from the first vote makes me very happy.  Let’s get into it!

We last left off with Jenn being put on the block after Frank removed himself with the POV.  Jenn gave an “impassioned” speech about what she is going to do since she is on the block, but I think it’s too little too late.  Boogie is sulking, and he confronts Ian to make sure that he will vote to keep him stay.  Ian is the worst liar ever.  Seeing as how the Silent Six Alliance is no more, it can now be said that the new alliance is The AWKWARD Silence in the house.  Boo hoo Boogie is upset because he knows he is going home.  They try to goad Dan into saying something and getting angry, but Dan just keeps his silence…for now.  Boogie’s the biggest sore loser ever.  He preaches at everyone to stay classy, the entirety of season 7, and here he is sulking and pouting and not practicing what he preaches.  Jenn then takes a page out of Boogie’s book and starts going on a tirade throughout the house.

Didn't see it coming!

Julie announces that tonight is a double eviction night, so the votes come first!  After listening to Jenn’s last speech, makes me think she is all bark and no bite.  Boogie then starts begging for votes, and that is the epitome of pathetic. Here is the breakdown of the first set of votes.

Ashley: Jenn!  What the heck?!

Britney: Boogie

Joe: Boogie

Frank: Jenn

Dan: Boogie

Ian: Boogie

Danielle: Boogie

And like that, the house is now STD free!

I usually don’t comment on the goodbye messages, as they are kind of lack luster, but tonight’s were awesome!  Even in Dan’s goodbye speech, he stayed true to his word to Ian.  He didn't throw him under the bus!  Britney is sooooo funny.  I loved her goodbye message, and she even referenced Janelle, my hero.  Ian totally bragged about evicting Boogie, and of course it overinflated an already over sized ego.  GOOD RIDDANCE! 

I usually comment on each round, but since there is so much stuff going on tonight, I decided just to announce the winners of the competition.  Ian wins his first competition, and he will finally have to get some blood on his hands.  Ian starts cutting deals with Joe, and if I were Joe I would just tell him what he wants to hear.  Who knew that Ian had the cajones to put up Ashley and Frank?  I sure didn’t.  Man, what a bitter banana.  The real reason is probably because they both voted to save Boogie, but I like to see it as him being jealous of the make out session they had a week ago. 

It doesn’t matter though because Frank the Tank wins veto.  I am pretty sure he has won the most amounts of competitions ever!  If he literally has nine lives, he has definitely used at least 7 of them these last few weeks.  Ashley gave the most convoluted speech, and Joe gave the first ever, silent speech.  Who will they vote to keep?

Jenn: Ashley

Now that she's gone, she should get tested

Shane: Ashley

Britney: Ashley

Frank: Joe

Danielle: Ashley

Dan: Ashley

Well, I got my wish of Frank staying this week, but at what cost?  Poor, sweet, misguided Ashley got the boot.  Well, I hope that Frank can at least win HOH tonight.  Who do you think will win HOH?  Does Frank deserve to stay?  Let me know!

Big Brother – Wednesday, August 22, - POV

I can’t believe it’s already Wednesday!  This week has blown by.  I started school again, so if my entries seem a little short or disjointed, bear with me, and always feel free to give me advice!

            I am so excited to see who wins POV tonight.  It can possibly be a game changer, but no matter how it turns out, I hope Boogie goes home!  Frank is upset that Shane has turned on his Silent Six alliance, and he regrets his decision keeping them safe last week.  Boogie seems upset, and he makes empty threats to when they both stay next week.  I will believe it when I see it.

Worst player ever!

            Frank and Boogie immediately corner Shane into confessing why he put them both up on the block.  Shane tells them that Joe was the source of his nomination decisions.  He also tells them that Britney influenced him into making a big move this week.  Shane is such a bad liar, and he starts babbling nonsense when put under fire.  Boogie’s argument that Britney doesn’t care about him is a load of crap.  Shane has all the more reason to trust Britney over Boogie!  Shane confesses his sins to Britney, and she is UPSET that he threw her under the bus.  She confronts Frank and Boogie, and he turns into a condescending a-hole to her.  Boogie is just upset that Britney has perfected what he did with Frank last week.  How can either of them say, Shane is her puppet?  I mean, it’s obvious that he is, but that is a definite case of the slop pot calling the kettle black.  Britney said that her information came from a reliable source, yet she kept Ian’s mole identity safe.

            I do understand Shane’s argument that he is getting all of the blood on his hands, but they should stop squabbling with each other and focus on getting one of them out this week!  My favorite quote is when Britney said, “I didn’t come here to lose due to someone else’s actions.”  And then she turns around and confesses in the DR that she just needs to control Shane better.  Here’s an idea, how about you win and HOH or Veto, and then make your own calls!

She is sad she chose the brainiac pictured above as her alliance

           

Who else thinks that Ian’s narcissism will get the better of him this week?  He is so proud of this move, and I know Dan is not going to take the fall for this one.  Boogie confronts Dan about this decision, and he confesses in the DR that he will just take the fall for this one.  Boogie calls him out, and wants to confront both Dan and Britney.  Frank is 100% convinced that Dan was the one that threw them both under the bus.  He just wants confirmation that he made the right call last week during his HOH.  I thought for sure that he would throw Ian under the bus!  Dan and Britney consider the pros and cons of keeping Ian’s mole identity safe.  This is the drama that makes this show so great!  I wish Janelle were still in the house to instigate it though, but that is neither here or there.

            Wow, I don’t want to say the Veto drawing was rigged, but seriously two Houseguest choices?  There didn’t seem to be that many chips in the bag!  The HGs are given small models of candy to study.  Using this estimate, they then have to guess how many pieces of candy make up the big models.  You can choose to stay or fold each round.  If you fold, you are safe for that round.  If you stay, you get a lollipop point.  If more than one person stays, then the person with the answer furthest from the correct number is eliminated.  Once you get three points, you win the POV!  I will spare you all of the details and just let you know how the rounds went. 

Round 1: Veto Mural -754 – Frank wins 1 point, and Boogie is eliminated

Frank Stays with 685

Ashley Folds with 1400

Shane Stays with 660

Boogie Stays with 628

Jenn Folds with 2,450

Ian Folds with 848

Round 2: Lollipop Tree – 1,377 – Frank wins 1 point, and Jenn is eliminated

Frank – Stays with 865

Ashley – Folds with 2400

Shane – Stays with 852

Jenn – Stays with 724

Ian – Folds 528

Round 3: Candy Hearts (in pounds) – 127 – Shane wins 1 point, and Ian is eliminated

Frank – Folds with 214

Ashley – Folds with 22?? I have to say her method to guessing is hilarious!

Shane – Shane stays with 109

Ian – Stays with 68

Round 4: Candy Dots Wallpaper 15,280 – Ashley wins 1 point, and Shane is eliminated!

Frank – Folds with 11,111

Ashley – Stays with 2,600

Shane – Stays in with 2,478

Round 5: Gumball Machine 848 – Frank wins 1 point by default, but he would have won anyways!

Frank – Stays with 498

Ashley – Folds with 400

That's right, Will is not here to help you this season...face!

Dan and Britney are upset because Frank is still safe in the house, but they should have voted him out instead of Janelle.  They listened to Boogie, made a bad move, and I said it weeks ago they are now regretting it.  I don’t see anyway that Dan will continue to take the heat for Ian.  Boogie wants to rally the floaters, and he tries to convince them to vote out Dan.  If they were smart, they would just take this chance to get rid of Boogie, but Jenn, Ashley, or Joe will not win this game no matter what they do.  I find it comical that these two don’t ever talk to these people except for when they need something.  Frank was even responsible for kicking out the leader of the floaters last week!  Why would they listen to him!  Boogie unloads a truck full of crap to Britney to convince her to get rid of Dan.  Let’s all be friends!  I saw where being friends got him in All-Stars.  He used and abused Erica all the way to the end, and managed to manipulate his way to $500,000.  I wish they would interview Erica this season, even though she was a total waste of space in both of her seasons.  I love how everyone wants to work with the HOH when his or her backs are against the wall.  You can’t trust them! That’s why they went on the block in the first place!  That’s just my little piece of advice for future players!  Frank uses the POV on himself, and Shane has to give another awkward speech.  He ultimately decides to put up Jenn, and that is a good call, as she is the one closest to Boogie. 

Do you think Boogie has a chance to stay in the house?  ARE YOU AS EXCITED AS I AM FOR DOUBLE EVICTION NIGHT?!  Let me know what you think.